In a fetish to watch some Shitty movies

I made a list of some bad bad movies I'll be watching now

*Bad movies to watch:

• Saw movies after the second (I love the traps, but now I will watch them for story)
  
• Matrix Sequels
  
• The Human Centipede (might get the second as well)
  
• Mortal Kombat Annihilation (I love the first, this one is just bad)
  
• King of Fighters the movie
  
• Magnolia
  
• Ghost Rider (shit)
  
• Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengeance (possibly shitty)
  
• IT
  
• The Langoliers
  
• Transformers Trilogy (Michael Bay series)

Gonna comment on those

I wanted to watch Hostel franchise, after skimming through the first one a little I decided to pass on those, it looks nothing beyond shit of the shit, hardly anything redeemable, so heh, fuck that franchise
Half an hour erotic stuff and porn
15 minutes of nothing
Followed by torture porn, and not like Saw movies with pointlessly elaborate (yet entertaining) traps

I wouldn't go as far as to say Ghost Rider was shit, it was just average adn had potential to be a lot more the action sequences were too short.

Odd thing about that movie, I own the director's cut and in that version the cops realise Jonny Blaze is Ghost Rider.

You never know, you might like Hostel. I had a friend who liked it, and I don't mean he found it entertaining. He actually thought it was disturbing and impactful and all that lark.

Hostel 2 is better than the first one as well. It's more serious in places and a lot sillier in other places.

I watched the first two Saw films before this decision coming to mind, so here's what I have to say about the first

Nice traps, yeah, they're interesting, but it's what got me thinking those movies should never be watched for the story, the story is too muddled up and not worth focusing on
Two guys trapped in an old bathroom, come to the conclusion they have to saw their chained foot to escape, then flashbacks

Danny Glover wants to arrest the doctor cause "Your pen was in the crime scene". What kind of evidence is that? Can't anyone buy a similar pen? Or even steal the Doc's pen? If it had the initials sure the Doc is placed in the right light, but if his alibi works, why keep him a suspect and try to jog his memory to something he didn't do?
I saw some stuff with the main baddy has an excusable alibi, so I guess that could be excused

Why the cops didn't try to stop the bad guy (hood, robe, hidden blade? Assassin's Creed anyone?) when he came to them in his place? Chain him and make sure he's disarmed? Check his face? Anything? For a plot device the writer should try to be good about it, instead of introducing two stupid cops
Bang, the Asian dies

That janitor speaks to the patient with interesting stories, so I guess that's how Jigsaw got the notion of abusing the janitor? What got him interested in the doctor? Did he see anything showing him as an interesting specimen? Did he ask the janitor to snoop on him? How did that guy (wait, did the doc say something about the hospital janitor being his Gardner?) what got him inside the house? Stupid plot device

Little girl "Daddy, I'm frightened, I saw someone in my room, please check it for me". So doc, if you checked the closet, did you happen to see a man in it? It's a kid closet, not hard to see a man in it. Why didn't anyone check?

The twist, the dead guy on the bathroom floor is the original trapster and ingenious mastermind, how did he manage to do that? He endured lying on the floor of a stinking bathroom floor all that time, completely still, and his head is touched with blood

And about everyone trapped in flashbacks, how did Jigsaw know all about those, abduct them, then build all those traps to make for what they do with their lives? They don't appreciate life? Everyone whines about something, what sort of excuse is that to abduct someone?

Pfft, story is beyond stupid, it made me come to the conclusion "those movies are not to be watched for the story, that is the wrong reason"

Superbuu3 wrote:

I wouldn't go as far as to say Ghost Rider was shit, it was just average adn had potential to be a lot more the action sequences were too short.

Odd thing about that movie, I own the director's cut and in that version the cops realise Jonny Blaze is Ghost Rider.

Before or after arresting him for murder of people near where he stays?

A_Nonny_Moose wrote:

You never know, you might like Hostel. I had a friend who liked it, and I don't mean he found it entertaining. He actually thought it was disturbing and impactful and all that lark.

After seeing elements of that movie I doubt I'll like it
Trailer made it look as if it's a decent horror film

Now it's up to SAW II, and boy, it starts by extra clarification of what a bored asshole Jisgsaw is with nothing better do with what's left of his life
"Hey kid, look at the TV screen, see? Yeah you little bastard, I saw what you do with your life, you observe people, but you have no right for condemning me for doing the exact same to say I hate you for not appreciating life"........
He didn't say that exactly, but you know, shit logic

Jigsaw = Batman from All Stars Batman & Robin, and here's why I say this (the peak of horrifyingly bad Batman fan fiction by those who say "Batman can beat anybody with a spoon and enough prep time"):
He knows everything about everyone and have all those traps ready for
His new sidekick is someone he puts in danger before having as sidekick

Amanda (Linda from Becker): "I survived Jigsaw's trap in the last movie, and that gave my kidnapper the idea of embracing me as his Robin, so I accept cause he is now like a father to me"
This logic made me both laugh and cry, are they serious or something? What the fuck did the writer(s) smoke before and while typing in their material?

Elvis Presley wrote:

Superbuu3 wrote:

I wouldn't go as far as to say Ghost Rider was shit, it was just average adn had potential to be a lot more the action sequences were too short.

Odd thing about that movie, I own the director's cut and in that version the cops realise Jonny Blaze is Ghost Rider.

Before or after arresting him for murder of people near where he stays?

A_Nonny_Moose wrote:

You never know, you might like Hostel. I had a friend who liked it, and I don't mean he found it entertaining. He actually thought it was disturbing and impactful and all that lark.

After seeing elements of that movie I doubt I'll like it
Trailer made it look as if it's a decent horror film

After, I'm pretty certain they actually see him transform or something. This fact was kinda ignored in the cinema version.

Elvis Presley wrote:

The twist, the dead guy on the bathroom floor is the original trapster and ingenious mastermind, how did he manage to do that? He endured lying on the floor of a stinking bathroom floor all that time, completely still, and his head is touched with blood

iirc, he or an accomplice injected him with something that would slow down his heartrate and stuff.. and then he puts some blood on him to fake like he's been attacked or something.. not sure if it's explained in the first one, but it's explained somewhere I think..



also Hostel is great, all three of them

Taking a break from Saw, watching MK Annihilation, and from the list I made it is the easiest to watch, at least compared to Human Centipede, Saw, and KoF film

Everyone enters the scene and dances

Shao Kahn: "Fuck you Earth, I will destroy you"
Rayden: "You won't"
*Fight*

What's the point of Rayden's "Takel Bzaaar" from the game ?

KAAAAHHHN is a pansy, he uses Sonya to place Rayden at bay
Rayden got the chance to kill all the generals, even with his probable knowledge Kahn is a bastard, but he let them go

Johnny Cage falls, FAILTALITY
That sucks to me, he's one of my favorites
Johnny is killed, Rayden attacked, everyone standing in position

Shao Kahn enters, purple clouds enter the scene with him
Shao Kahn exits, no more purple clouds
If his magic goes away with him, how come the thing rising under Cage is there and rising only after Kahn and his cronies leave?

"Kitanna, we shall reunite you with your mother so the spell Kahn put on her break, and we can forget your reunion when she told you to die, it doesn't count"
"Enter these balls and separate, we shall unite later, I will now leave you alone to get Jax Sonya, I must go to some of my masters"

Kitana opens her fans, they're sharp, it's time to decapitate some ninja trolls
Blood free Mortal Kombat movie, opening her fans is there just to show she has them

Sub-Zero unmasks after Liu Kang mentioning killing him
I'm sorry, but what made you think Liu Kang saw the face of your brother?

Kitanna is kidnapped, and Sub-Zero tells Kang "What happened here should prove you're not ready to face what's ahead alone"
Ok, but you were with him, so was Kitanna, why tell him that then leave as Kang turned his head? Then never return to the film?

Jax is a cop, why would he need metal enhancements?
How did Rayden know where to find him? Last line he told Liu Kang in the first movie is about him not knowing humans
Makers of this movie don't like consistent continuity

Sheeva and Kintaro hate each other, but she jumps to him and he almost hugs her
Rain killed some of Earth's finest warrior, for not letting them begging for their lives he is executed, though he did a fine job
Kahn is a moron, his father told him that, but didn't even hold his ear over it, and Kahn let Rayden and his warriors escape, why hammer Rain who actually did his job right?

A wolf jumps at Liu Kang, slo mo frames
Wolf leaves, he turns to a man
Heeeyyyy, it's that Nightwolf Rayden told Kang to seek, but never told him why
Nightwolf: "Hey Liu, I'll hit you with this on the head, you find your animality while you are fainted"
Liu sees the face of Kahn, and he never saw it before. The fuck?

This movie is all bad stuff everywhere, can't find a scene without something to comment on

I'll jump to joking on the final scene

Shao Kahn repeatedly beating Liu Kang, but Liu Kang endures
Animality, they fall, usless thing goes away
After Kang hitting Kahn a few hits, Kahn falls, story ends
What a wuss that Kahn is

Shinnok to Shao Kahn " I warned you there will be consequences to breaking the rules"
You said you broke the rules for him earlier

Now that Mortal Kombat Annihilation annihilated the series and I'm done with it, I'll take a break before moving to next shit, I guess it will be Human Centipede 1

Before playing the first movie, I took a glimpse on the second Human Centipede, and it looks like a fat dickhead saw the first movie and decided he should do this, and the moron is doing it in a parking building, or a parking area of a building

Is the movie black and white or is it just the copy I found?

Human Centipede 1 starts with the German psychopath in his car waiting, seeing a fat white guy about to take a shit in the open, the doc catches him, then we shift to a room with what I think has two lesbians, they share one bed in the room, not sure they are or aren't lesbians

Two girls in a car, car is trapped, a fat jerk see they don't speak German (I think that's where they are, unless they're in Austria or someplace like that), but he keeps talking and the chicks see he seeks to fuck them, and they make sure he goes away

Then they walk to find help replacing their flat tire

The girls reach the house of that asshole psycho to seek help, but he questions them to make sure they are proper material for his shitty experiment
Readies tap water with tranqs in the glasses

The girls ask the guy if he lives with his wife, he responds he doesn't like human beings
Get out bitches, it's a bad sign, he hosted you to do something horrible to you, get away
They stayed long enough for the doctor to go down to his basement and return, although one of them clearly said they need to exit