Kima Quickshot - LOTR Conquest Demo Impressions

I just tried the demo for "Lord of the Rings: Conquest" on my PS3 (also for X360 and PC for those who are interested). Well, I figure I might as well blurt out what I thought about it, so here goes.

I didn't care for it very much. It's supposedly "Star Wars Battlefront" with a Lord of the Rings theme (and "Battlefront" being "Battlefield 1942" with a Star Wars theme), but I don't think it even really comes that close. Sure, it roughly fits that description, but it doesn't feel executed very well... unless you twist the context of "executed".

To start things off, canon is butched. If Isildur became king of Gondor in "3434 of the Second Age", then why is the Battle of the Last Alliance (after which Isildur became king) listed as "3441, Second Age"? Someone fucked up big time... and I'm not even getting to the in-game characters! Sure, giving the Warrior class flaming swords is cool at first, but it ruins the atmosphere of being a grunt of Gondor or Morder.... and that's to say nothing of generic Mages blasting their way left and right.

Quite frankly, I don't think the classes play very well. Yes, the Warrior has "Light", "Medium", and "Heavy" attacks, but that makes no difference since there's only one worthwhile combo that you can make from those! So why have three buttons to do the job of one?

The Archers feel really sluggish... I guess one would assume so given how they are using bows and arrows, but it still feels awkward. Archers also have specialty (Fire and Poison) arrows, but there seems to be no point to them; they just add extra damage to a shot that OHKOs them anyway!

The Scouts seem like a waste of time. Yes, they can cloak in the midst of battle to sneak around enemies and do a one-shot fatality from behind. Awesome concept, but it just doesn't work! Everyone is constantly moving around and it is nearly impossible to get that kill... and if you miss, you become visible. The Scout can also fight similar to the Warrior, but their own combos are so piss-weak that you might as well cloak and run away, continuing your worthless existance.

Mages are the most diverse class, filling in a lot of the support roles. Healing, shielding, heavy ranged support... they're almost like a fusion of a Droideka and Medic from "Battlefront"... except with a much slower rate of fire. Still, while a jack of all trades, they are master of none; dividing your attention between them makes you almost as worthless as the Scout. As to top of my bitching, making Mages as a grunt soldier in Lord of the Rings makes the canon-whore in my blood scream.

The thing that pisses me off the most, however, is how easily you get knocked over and how hard it is to get back up again. It's almost like a reverse of that "Tubthumping" song, except you're getting up but get knocked down again. It makes what should be a simple engagement into an irritating war of attrition... and the lack of a "kill 'em while their down" finisher move just makes the situation all the more tedious.

Overall, I was not impressed by this game. I was considering getting it on sheer fanboyism, but because I was smart and tried the demo first, I know now that this game would only piss me off to the utmost degree. I'll save my money and get something I'll like much more.

Plus, I heard you get half the trophies by completing the game once

I don't know anything about that. I was just reviewing the demo.